Seeking Refuge Through Counseling

Is Your Marriage Going Through A Very Tough Time?

Have you had big changes in your life that have caused your marriage to suffer? Maybe one of you has lost employment. It might be that your family had to move to a different city, and you and your spouse weren't together in making that decision. The tough time in your marriage could be as serious as one of you having broken the marriage vows. No matter what has happened to cause your marriage to suffer, are you looking for help? If so, continue reading for some help that might play a big part in saving your marriage. 

You have probably heard many times that communication is key to a good relationship. While that's true, making sacrifices might be even more important.

Are You Willing To Make Sacrifices To Save Your Marriage? - Think of sitting down as husband and wife to talk about what you are willing to do to bring real joy back into your marriage.

  • For example, if you made the move to the new city, consider that a done deal. Whoever was against the move might need to swallow his or her pride and vow to make the best of the move.
  • If your marriage is suffering because of financial strain caused by one of you losing employment, sit down to see what can be done in that area. For example, are both of you willing to sell your expensive home and move into a more modest one while you get back on good financial footing? 
  • Obviously, the breaking of vows is extremely serious. Whoever cheated, has to be totally willing never to make contact with the other party ever again. Whoever was hurt must be willing to work on forgiveness and on going forward while working on trust issues.

Obviously, there are many other scenarios that might take the place of those that were addressed already. But, the obvious will be true no matter the situation. Sacrifices are worth the outcome.

Are You Willing To Go To Marriage Therapy? - Maybe you have both tried hard, but you just can't get over the hurt that has been caused. In that case, are you and your spouse willing to see a professional marriage therapist? 

  • You can get the name of a marriage therapist or family therapy clinic from your doctor or from your ecclesiastic leader. He or she will recommend a counselor who has the training and the experience to deal with more problems that you can probably think of.
  • Both of you need to be willing to be totally honest with the counselor. 
  • When you are given counsel, don't discount it. For instance, if one of you makes an accusation, the counselor might say something like, There's almost always at least an element of truth in what is being said. Are both of you willing to look inside of your hearts and minds to see what you can do to change? 

Think about having a notebook in a place where only you and your spouse can use it. Enter concerns and questions in the journal. Just as important, write down sweet messages that will lead to healing in your marriage. Set a time each day, or at east several times a week, when you can talk together about the notebook entries.